Writing your personal profile is a bit like writing a short your biography about yourself with a focus on your dating and relationship needs. In some ways, this is like your resume, but unlike a job application, the purpose is not to simply state your qualifications, but rather, to give other members of the online dating community an overview of who you are and what you are looking for in a partner. Remember that people will emotionally react to your profile the same way you react to people you meet in real life everyday, and an inconsistent or unbelievable pitch will come off as scattered and untrustworthy.
Most profiles are made up of three important features: photos, written descriptions about yourself, and categorical labels that allow for automated matching of your profile to searches and queries in the site.
In selecting your photos, you should distinguish between your primary photo and about 3-4 complementing photos that flesh out your lifestyle and personality. While displaying your photo is usually optional, studies show that profiles with pictures are more than 10 times more likely to get noticed. As this is the face that most viewers will see when they are scrolling your profile, your primary photo should essentially be the most attractive portrait you have of yourself: it should prominently feature your face, and should be a solo picture with no one else in the frame. Your secondary photos may show a more rounded view of your life: you with your car or motorbike, out with a group of friends, surfing, working, or whatever else you want to say about your lifestyle. If you find that your profile is receiving an overwhelming number of responses (particularly relevant for attractive women), you might actually need to ‘hide’ your profile pictures and make them available only to suitors that you allow to view your photos.
Your written descriptions are both a means of defining yourself and your expectations. This is where you may present your interests in order to better define the types of partners you are looking for to specify your relationship goals. If you just want NSA sex, you’re better off admitting that you’re not looking for a relationship from the start, and don’t waste your time with relationship minded suitors.
The last element of your general profile is the list of options usually defined by radio buttons and drop-down menus that defines your marital status, age, general interests, personality type, relationship goals, etc. These options are usually used to tag your profile for search and matching software used by dating sites to calculate compatibility between members of the dating community. As with defining yourself in your written descriptions, the more general you are, them more individuals you will be deemed compatible with, while being more selective will narrow your compatibility options but give you a more compatible list of potential mates.
It is a good idea to invest an hour or two into writing a profile that authentically represents you as an individual in as attractive manner as possible. While it may be tempting to lie about your shortcomings, remember that it will all eventually come out in the open when you meet face-to-face, and people are more likely to make concessions in the beginning than feel comfortable with someone who has lied about themselves from the start.
With a good profile in hand, you’re now ready to advance your training to understanding the other fundamental tools of online dating.